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megastir
Mega means big or large
stir because I like to mix it up
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Friday, May 23, 2003 :::
Once upon a time there was a small boy. This boy always felt a bit the outsider. When his family went to the mall he liked to walk a few meters behind as a symbol of his status. Soon after entering school he watched all the other little boys and wondered, why can't I be like them? Eventually he started making up stories about himself, clever fantastic stories about his origins. As he entered middle school he wanted to be like the cool kids. He watched them and imitated them but he was never cool.
He had crushes on several different little girls but was always to shy and insecure to say anything. Then in high school he be came very self conscious about his looks. Puberty sucks. But never the less he achieved small victories, a job, lots of friends, decent marks in school and even a few girl friends. Never a big fan of school he realized that he would miss the halls of learning and as it came to a close he bid it a fond farewell then went on to University.
By now he had a steady girlfriend who helped him become more confident he worked and helped pay his way through school and for the first time in his life his jobs afforded him the opportunity to travel. He saw Rocky Mountains and blue oceans. He discovered he was good at several things and that people liked him. This was very good for his self image and a circle of confidence began the more he felt good about himself the more others seemed to enjoy his companionship.
"People like confidence, they like to be around self assurance. It is an attractive quality, Interesting" he thought "I spent all that time as a kid wanting to be those confident cool kids, now I understand why."
Slowly he spent time at his passions and gradually became very good at these activities. Many people thought these activities were dangerous or even crazy but he knew that like many endeavors small steps taken gradually could lead one to higher and higher levels of achievement. Confidence builds with every small accomplishment and eventually you are able to do things others think are incredible. His mantra became "A go out in heavy conditions should not be taken lightly." This philosophy helped avoid foolish mistakes.
Eventually the little boy who by now looked like a man decided that he needed to put down some roots. He used his skills and developed a web of economic activity around him. Soon he had real estate, automobiles, soccer moms and all the other trappings of life in the 21 century.
All the while the little boy inside the mans body still lurked even though life's lessons had been absorbed and on the exterior people saw a confident character the little boy was still there. He was there when the man was confidently charging in radical situations; he was there when the man was making complex decisions. He was always there.
Now as the man was getting older he no longer felt as physically confident. His web of economic activity was spinning increasingly out of control. He no longer felt master over his domain. The little boy was starting to emerge.
The man watched a lot of TV. People on TV are cool. "I wish I was like the cool TV people" thought the little man. "If only I had the things they had then I would be happy."
The little man started shopping and gambling and drinking all the things that the cool TV men did but he was never happy. In fact each new activity stripped away his old layers of confidence and left him less sure of himself. "Why is it not like on TV? I shop, I drink, I gamble I should be happy." Then he got sick, really really sick and he thought a lot about his life. He was losing it, but what little remained he decided to go back to a time of having less. "Less is more" so he ditched his complex world and found a simple life and this was better.
Then he died.
::: posted by Mega at 6:38 AM
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