Friday, February 14, 2003 :::
 

For Immediate Release:

Rupert West Quebec: Megastir annouced today to a news weary gaggle of reporters that he is hungry. He began the press conference by videophone on a giant plasma TV screen projecting his mega image twenty feet larger than life above the assembled throng.

"I have a hunger" he stated as the reporters smacked their collective lips at this suggestion. "It is not the normal hunger for food you might be thinking of, but a hunger for a world of greater mystery." As the scribes gazed transfixed at the spectacle on the High definition plasma console megastir continued. "As you know I have been living in a remote corner of the world where cable television is not yet available. However through good fortune and the miracle of the international network of linked computers I have been monitoring the activities of others for the last several months. In doing so I have begun to feel like the fabled big brother in Orwell's classic 1984." The irony of the moment was not lost on the crowd.

"When I began my megablog my goal was to assemble individual letters from the English alphabet into words that when strung together would project my thoughts outward through remarkable technology to a global audience. However like most things in my life I have failed miserably. I realize I spend most of my days alone naked in the dark playing scrabble with no one. When I do venture out it is only to view the world though my laptop portal where I cheer on the exploits of my imaginary friends who inhabit a world so FANTASTIC I am compelled to make a feeble attempt at communication with these individuals. In doing so I become that much more intrigued by their universe, and them by mine."

As the mass of reporters gazed upward they were suddenly aware of music being piped into the conference room, the unmistakable sounds of Pink Floyd's Comfortably Numb was becoming the sound track to this bizarre scene.

"My hunger has become fierce as I have used this so called internet to view the lives of the bloggers and then when I am overwhelmed by the sheer scale of the information I retreat into the darkness of my hovel where I gaze anxiously out my window at a physical world that has become so foreign to me."

With that the plasma screen suddenly rose and emerging from the shadows the striking figure of Megastir suddenly came into focus he did not stop at the podium but advanced through the crowd who strangely parted like the Red Sea before moses, then as the mass of reportage pressed their microphone close for one final quote the music began blaring at an unconfortably loud volume.

"So long suckers!" was all you could hear as Mr. stir jumped into his slammed 1967 Pontiac Strato Chief and peeled out in a choking haze of leaded gasoline exhaust. Bouncing behind were the shattered remains of a broken Dell inspiron laptop which slid slowly to a stop in front of the frozen audience. It was logged on to http://www.megastir.blogspot.com

::: posted by Mega at 9:05 AM

Comments: Post a Comment

ARCHIVES :::

Mega means big or large stir because I like to mix it up